How to Set Goals That Align with Your Values
Introduction
Have you ever set a goal, worked hard to achieve it, and then felt… nothing, no real reward?
You hit the milestone. You checked the box. But instead of fulfillment, all you felt was exhaustion or emptiness. If that sounds familiar, you’re not alone—and the problem isn’t you. It’s the kind of goals you’re setting.
Many of us are conditioned to chase achievements that look good on paper but don’t reflect who we truly are. The key to lasting motivation and real joy? Setting goals that align with your own personal values. In this guide, you’ll learn exactly how to do that—and walk away with a clear, purpose-driven action plan.
Why Most Goal-Setting Advice Fails for Women
Typical goal-setting frameworks like SMART goals can be helpful, but they often miss one crucial ingredient: alignment with your identity and core, personal values.
As women, we’re frequently pulled in a multitude of directions—career, family, relationships, societal expectations (to name a few). It’s easy to internalize goals that outsiders (like society) think we should pursue, rather than those that genuinely light us up. And we all know “shoulding” ourselves is detrimental.
That’s why even “successful” people often feel disconnected from their achievements. Alignment with values and identity is everything.
Step 1: Identify Your Core Values
Before you can set powerful goals that lead to fulfillment, you need to know what matters to you.
Here are a few examples of personal values to consider:
- Freedom
- Creativity
- Health
- Growth
- Family
- Spirituality
- Contribution
- Adventure
- Security
- Authenticity
Exercise: Choose 5–7 values that resonate most with you. Ask yourself:
- What makes me feel satisfied?
- What non-negotiables do I have in my life?
- Who do I admire—and what values do they live by?
(Tip: Create a values vision board or journal them to clarify.)
Step 2: Reflect on Your Past Goals
Look back at goals you’ve pursued in the past—successful or not.
- Which ones brought real contentment and true gratification?
- Which felt draining or forced?
- What patterns do you notice?
Journaling Prompts:
- “What goals have I quit—and what does that reveal about my values?”
- “Which accomplishments am I most proud of, and why?”
This step helps filter out goals rooted in external pressure and reconnects you to what feels personally meaningful.
Step 3: Set Intentional Goals That Serve Your Values
Now that you’re clear on your values and past patterns, it’s time to align your goals with those values.
Instead of setting goals like “make $100k,” try:
“Build a business or career that gives me freedom and allows me to support other women.”
Examples:
- Value: Health → Goal: Move my body every day in a way I enjoy
- Value: Creativity → Goal: Launch a blog to express my voice
- Value: Family → Goal: Spend one phone-free hour with loved ones daily
Aligned goals feel energizing—not heavy. You’re not forcing effort; you’re channeling purpose.
Step 4: Break Goals into Aligned Action Steps
Clarity without execution is a wish. So take your aligned goals and break them into achievable steps.
Use a modified SMART framework:
- Specific to your value
- Measurable enough to track progress
- Aligned with a core belief
- Realistic based on your life stage
- Time-based, but flexible
Example:
- Goal: Prioritize wellness (Value: Health)
- Mini Step: Walk 20 minutes every weekday
Step 5: Revisit and Realign Regularly
Life shifts—and your values might too. Schedule monthly or quarterly check-ins to ask:
- Am I still excited about this goal and the steps to achieve it?
- Does this still align with my identity and values?
- What needs adjusting?
Free Template: Try a printable “Goal Check-In Journal” to keep track of your alignment and emotional engagement over time. (click here to access our free template)
Common Goal-Setting Mistakes to Avoid
🚫 Setting goals to please others or outside factors
🚫 Chasing results that don’t reflect your passions
🚫 Taking on too many goals at once
🚫 Ignoring your emotional reaction to the goal
Remember: if a goal doesn’t feel right, it’s not right for you—and that’s okay.
Tools to Help You Stay on Track
Here are a few products and tools that can support your aligned goal-setting journey:
- Top Wellness Planners for Women
- Best Journals for Mental Clarity & Growth
- Apps: Notion, Goals Wizard, or Habitica
Choose the ones that fit your life and make your goals feel doable, not overwhelming.
Final Thoughts: You’re Allowed to Want What You Want
Your life isn’t meant to be a checklist. It’s meant to feel like you.
When your goals are aligned with your core values, motivation becomes natural, and success feels like empowerment—not obligation.
Today’s Action:
Grab a notebook and write down your top 5 values. Then brainstorm one goal that supports each. Small steps lead to big alignment.
Over to my you, my fellow FUs:
What’s one value you want to build your next goal around? Share it in the comments or join the conversation on Instagram @thefeministunicorns85.
